put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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