Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
