So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
