I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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