Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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