She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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