I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize