Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
