Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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