i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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