Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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