Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
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