she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
