She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
