Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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