why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
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cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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