She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
