It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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