Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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