I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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