This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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