How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
cat food counts as protein by the way
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
