I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
now i know why i became what i already was.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
