Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
