So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
