no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
