My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
