i was rollin on her like bob the builder
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Randomize
