i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
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frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
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A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
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