I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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