I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
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But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
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I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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