I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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