her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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