i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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