Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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