yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
