i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
