I wanna bring you to show and tell
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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