I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
