It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize