dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I should be sponsored by Trojan
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
