Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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