Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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