I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
you inspire me to be a worse person
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
