This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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