she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
