She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
