i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Randomize
