Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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