I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize