Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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