i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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