Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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